We recently had a big day in our house. Mr. A had a screening for kindergarten as he starts in the fall. It is a big deal of course so I was excited and nervous as I dropped him off yesterday and was more worried that he would be shy than anything else.
I went to pick him up (they have you drop them off for 2 hours) I was excited to see him, see how he did, and see what he thought about the whole thing. Before he saw me, I saw him and for a brief moment, my heart stopped. All the kids had made bracelets and necklaces but Mr. A had picked pink and purple. I quickly recovered what I am sure was a look of shock before he saw me and went to get him, complete with a big hug.
Now, I have no issues with pink and purple for a boy. He has always enjoyed painting finger nails, wearing tutus, picking pink paper instead of blue, and stealing my skirts to wear as dresses. None of that bothers me in the least.
For that moment when my heart stopped, I was worrying about what the other kids were going to say to him or if anyone had said anything to him.
We all know most mothers want to do what they can to keep kids safe and happy and I am no different in that respect. I am also painfully aware of how hard it can be when other kids decide you are "different" and start pointing that out.
Part of what got me about the situation is I wasn't prepared for it. I hadn't seen it coming at all. If he had decided he wanted to bring a purse to school I would have let him, and I would have explained to him that some of the other kids might think that is silly and might say things to him, but that it is totally okay to bring a purse if he wants to. I felt ill prepared as I hadn't thought of color prefernces.
I talked to him about what he thought of "school". He told me he had a great time and really liked it, so I was able to breathe a sigh of relief as it seems the other kids didn't notice his choice of beads, or if they did, they didn't care (which isn't THAT surprising at 5 years old).
The whole thing brought up my own insecurities as a parent. More than anything in the world I want my children to be accepted and loved. I know in reality most kids get bullied (even the bullies) but I also know that a boy that likes pink and purple is a more likely target than some of the others.
We all know that kids can be cruel and adults can be even more so. Sometimes people don't accept things that are "different".
I would NEVER dream of telling my son that pink is a "girl" color or tell him to go play in the woods instead of pretending to be a princess. I love him 100% and I want him to be the person that he is. I just hope I am able to raise him to be strong enough to handle what comes his way, no matter what, and to know that his Mama is ALWAYS here and will never judge him, only offer love and support when he needs it.
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting. Show all posts
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Day 25 + A Proud Mama
So normally I am not a person that brags. I try to be humble about this. However I am so proud of my little man that I simply can't contain it anymore so here it comes.
He starts Kindergarten this September, in less than 8 months. We haven't really been "schooling" him here but when letters/numbers/colors come up we go with it and work on it a little just like we have done since he was a baby (and do with his sister as well).
He not only knows all his letters and the sounds they make, he also knows a few "special" combination of letters like "th" and "ph" and "sh". He can sound out words and read whole sentences this way on his own.
He has been working on writing his letters as well. He has a few that are tricky but today he figured out the "up down, up down" of the M and was SO excited. This is a picture of this mornings letters on his magna doodle. M was a favorite but there are T, B, H, A, and a few others in there as well.
He also knows all his numbers, up to at least 40 (probably 50 in reality). He can read a digital clock and has a basic understand of analog clocks.
He of course knows all his colors. He knows several dinosaurs and knows what brand of cars a lot of his cars are.
The child is just a sponge that wants to know everything and anything. Always full of questions and always listening to the reasons for things. He really enjoys nature shows (like Planet Earth etc) and has learned a lot about nature through asking questions.
I am so proud of this little guy. Always on the quest for knowledge and soaking it right up into his (rather large) head.
He starts Kindergarten this September, in less than 8 months. We haven't really been "schooling" him here but when letters/numbers/colors come up we go with it and work on it a little just like we have done since he was a baby (and do with his sister as well).
He not only knows all his letters and the sounds they make, he also knows a few "special" combination of letters like "th" and "ph" and "sh". He can sound out words and read whole sentences this way on his own.
He has been working on writing his letters as well. He has a few that are tricky but today he figured out the "up down, up down" of the M and was SO excited. This is a picture of this mornings letters on his magna doodle. M was a favorite but there are T, B, H, A, and a few others in there as well.
He also knows all his numbers, up to at least 40 (probably 50 in reality). He can read a digital clock and has a basic understand of analog clocks.
He of course knows all his colors. He knows several dinosaurs and knows what brand of cars a lot of his cars are.
The child is just a sponge that wants to know everything and anything. Always full of questions and always listening to the reasons for things. He really enjoys nature shows (like Planet Earth etc) and has learned a lot about nature through asking questions.
I am so proud of this little guy. Always on the quest for knowledge and soaking it right up into his (rather large) head.
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Project 365 Day 15 + Motherhood
I love being a mom. Nothing makes me happier than a brilliant smile from one of my kids.
I am also a stay at home mom so I am dealing with my children all day by myself. I love them to pieces but Monday morning at 8am is pretty hard around here. Both my kids are at stages where they want to talk constantly and being young, they don't need coffee in the least. Indoor voices aren't something they seem to be capable of at 8am and both always try to talk over each other.
Then they look at me and say "Mama I yuv you and yike you a yot." None of the noise matters anymore after I hear that. I have done my job.
Being a stay at home mom also means I am in charge of all the housework. Laundry, dishes, sweeping, mopping, catboxes, garbage, meal planning, and grocery shopping are all on my "to do" lists just about everyday.
Then I sit and snuggle on the couch with my kids while reading a book and I forget about the 4 loads of laundry waiting upstairs to be folded and I forget about unloading the dishwasher. Those can wait, we can only read books for so long. No doubt before I know it they will be spending all their time in their rooms or with friends, not wanting to sit and snuggle with mom.
So, I will enjoy the responsibility and handle the noise, because in the blink of an eye it will be all but silent in my home.
I am also a stay at home mom so I am dealing with my children all day by myself. I love them to pieces but Monday morning at 8am is pretty hard around here. Both my kids are at stages where they want to talk constantly and being young, they don't need coffee in the least. Indoor voices aren't something they seem to be capable of at 8am and both always try to talk over each other.
Then they look at me and say "Mama I yuv you and yike you a yot." None of the noise matters anymore after I hear that. I have done my job.
Being a stay at home mom also means I am in charge of all the housework. Laundry, dishes, sweeping, mopping, catboxes, garbage, meal planning, and grocery shopping are all on my "to do" lists just about everyday.
Then I sit and snuggle on the couch with my kids while reading a book and I forget about the 4 loads of laundry waiting upstairs to be folded and I forget about unloading the dishwasher. Those can wait, we can only read books for so long. No doubt before I know it they will be spending all their time in their rooms or with friends, not wanting to sit and snuggle with mom.
So, I will enjoy the responsibility and handle the noise, because in the blink of an eye it will be all but silent in my home.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Project 365 Day 3 + The End of an Era
I have been working on little projects around the house in order to not go insane. I don't handle clutter well and it accumulated in copious amounts while I was doing Spring 2010 Semester (15 credits) then summer time (who wants to be indoors??) then Fall 2010 semester (9 credits). Now that school and summer are over, I have a chance to take care of the clutter that has gathered.
Today's project was cleaning out cloth diapers. This was the resulting pile.
I posted all those diapers on craigslist today to go to new homes (as a lot).
What that means, is the end of an era has come to my home. It is time to transition from having babies to having a kindergartener and a preschooler. This is probably one of the most bittersweet feelings I have ever had. I love babies, however I also know I am ready to be done with that stage.
Both of my kids are extremely independent and don't need me there ALL the time and this is a huge plus in my daily life. If I need to go upstairs to fold laundry, not a problem in the least. I can hear them but they don't need me there with them. It is the same thing for going outside. Ms. I is not a fan of the cold at all, Mr. A on the other hand LOVES the cold and will spend hours outside if need be. He is at the age now where he can play outside alone safely. The idea of starting from scratch with a baby that needs me there 100% of the time just isn't appealing.
So, away goes the baby gear, starting with these diapers.
Time to start a new page in our lives, parenting big kids.
Today's project was cleaning out cloth diapers. This was the resulting pile.
I posted all those diapers on craigslist today to go to new homes (as a lot).
What that means, is the end of an era has come to my home. It is time to transition from having babies to having a kindergartener and a preschooler. This is probably one of the most bittersweet feelings I have ever had. I love babies, however I also know I am ready to be done with that stage.
Both of my kids are extremely independent and don't need me there ALL the time and this is a huge plus in my daily life. If I need to go upstairs to fold laundry, not a problem in the least. I can hear them but they don't need me there with them. It is the same thing for going outside. Ms. I is not a fan of the cold at all, Mr. A on the other hand LOVES the cold and will spend hours outside if need be. He is at the age now where he can play outside alone safely. The idea of starting from scratch with a baby that needs me there 100% of the time just isn't appealing.
So, away goes the baby gear, starting with these diapers.
Time to start a new page in our lives, parenting big kids.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Project 365 Day 2 + Our Parenting
Today my kids ate soup for lunch while Rammstein was playing.
Now of course, this brings up some interesting parenting ideas. My children, age 4.5 and 2.5, listen to Rammstein and this is not everyone's parenting choice. It seems strange to some parents (a lot as I am finding) to let the kids listen to things like this.
In general, as parents, my husband and I go about our lives as normal with the kids here. I didn't stop listening to the radio when I had kids, or switch to country or something more "family friendly". We listen to what we would otherwise listen to.
The same goes for movies. My children have seen all three Jurassic Park movies. They love dinosaurs, both of them, and like to know all about them. My husband and I are big fans of Jurassic Park just as good mindless stuff to have on the television plus, for its time, the special effects are pretty impressive.
I sat with them during all the movies and answered questions they had. I also watched faces during times that might be "scary" for them. Most of the violence, especially in the first movie, is implied, so they didn't really "get" a lot of the stuff that was suppose to be scary. One of the movies though (I can't remember if it is the 2nd or 3rd) has a giant T-rex eating a person. Now it isn't gory or bloody, but it clearly eats the man.
My son asked me why the dinosaur ate the man. So, I explained to him that scientists thought that when dinosaurs were alive, they ate meat (which has since some have thought to be bunk) just like the lions on the nature shows we watch. I asked him if he remembered how lions ate other animals, and he said he did, so I explained that if a T-rex was dropped in a city that people would just be like other animals to the dinosaur, so if it were hungry, it might eat people.
I then reminded him that dinosaurs aren't alive anymore and that the movie was all pretend.
He as fine with that, as was my daughter who was also watching.
It is all about knowing your kids and knowing what might upset them. It is also important to answer all the questions they have about what is going on. If I don't know the answer offhand, which sometimes I don't, I use the internet and find my answer. This applies to all things, not just material that may be "questionable" to other parents.
Now, this isn't to say that I will play Full Metal Jacket in front of my kids (or myself for that matter). We do have limits of course, but the reality is they are going to see and hear things out in the world that may not be entirely age appropriate and it is important to us to already have those lines of communication open so they know they can come to us and ask any question they want/ need an answer to.
Now of course, this brings up some interesting parenting ideas. My children, age 4.5 and 2.5, listen to Rammstein and this is not everyone's parenting choice. It seems strange to some parents (a lot as I am finding) to let the kids listen to things like this.
In general, as parents, my husband and I go about our lives as normal with the kids here. I didn't stop listening to the radio when I had kids, or switch to country or something more "family friendly". We listen to what we would otherwise listen to.
The same goes for movies. My children have seen all three Jurassic Park movies. They love dinosaurs, both of them, and like to know all about them. My husband and I are big fans of Jurassic Park just as good mindless stuff to have on the television plus, for its time, the special effects are pretty impressive.
I sat with them during all the movies and answered questions they had. I also watched faces during times that might be "scary" for them. Most of the violence, especially in the first movie, is implied, so they didn't really "get" a lot of the stuff that was suppose to be scary. One of the movies though (I can't remember if it is the 2nd or 3rd) has a giant T-rex eating a person. Now it isn't gory or bloody, but it clearly eats the man.
My son asked me why the dinosaur ate the man. So, I explained to him that scientists thought that when dinosaurs were alive, they ate meat (which has since some have thought to be bunk) just like the lions on the nature shows we watch. I asked him if he remembered how lions ate other animals, and he said he did, so I explained that if a T-rex was dropped in a city that people would just be like other animals to the dinosaur, so if it were hungry, it might eat people.
I then reminded him that dinosaurs aren't alive anymore and that the movie was all pretend.
He as fine with that, as was my daughter who was also watching.
It is all about knowing your kids and knowing what might upset them. It is also important to answer all the questions they have about what is going on. If I don't know the answer offhand, which sometimes I don't, I use the internet and find my answer. This applies to all things, not just material that may be "questionable" to other parents.
Now, this isn't to say that I will play Full Metal Jacket in front of my kids (or myself for that matter). We do have limits of course, but the reality is they are going to see and hear things out in the world that may not be entirely age appropriate and it is important to us to already have those lines of communication open so they know they can come to us and ask any question they want/ need an answer to.
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